Postpartum: Things No-One Warned Me About - Mental Health Edition

Entering the world of motherhood is like crossing into a territory that, despite all the stories and advice, remains largely uncharted until you're standing in it yourself. I’m Elisabeth from Elle’s Corner, where we dive deep into the nuances of maternal mental health. Today, I want to share with you the raw, unfiltered reality of my postpartum journey—a journey no one quite prepared me for.

I had this notion, woven deeply into my identity, that craving motherhood inherently equipped me with all the knowledge and instincts needed to excel in it. I believed I should intuitively know how to care for my baby, making the idea of seeking advice feel almost like an admission of failure. It felt like asking for help would strip me of my motherhood badge before I had even begun to wear it with pride. And boy did I feel I was ready to wear that badge!

I had this notion, woven deeply into my identity, that craving motherhood inherently equipped me with all the knowledge and instincts needed to excel in it

There's a narrative that persists among women, a kind of unspoken competition that undermines the very essence of community and support. Instead of fostering a village where we rise by lifting each other, there's a pressure to figure it all out on your own and on top of that be the best at it. But during those early days, when the loneliness crept in, I yearned for a sisterhood—a safe space where asking for help wasn't seen as weakness but as a step towards collective strength and wisdom.

In my quest (even before my baby was born) for knowledge, I turned to midwives, healthcare professionals, doulas, and lactation specialists. But it seemed all their guidance stopped at birth, leaving me stranded on the shores of postpartum reality without a compass. One of the hardest lessons I had to learn was that babies don't just know how to sleep; it's a skill they have to learn, and guiding them through it is part of our journey together.

Then came the hormone crash. Nothing could have prepared me for the sheer cliff drop from pregnancy to postpartum life. Amidst this tumultuous time, comments about how breastfeeding would slim me down felt like salt on an open wound. My battle was with my mind, fighting to find solid ground, not with my body striving to meet some societal beauty standard.

I was blindsided by the return of my period just eight weeks postpartum, igniting a fresh hormone imbalance that made navigating my mental health even more challenging. The relentless cycle of late-night Googling, searching for a glimmer of hope that soon I'd feel mentally stronger, became my norm.

Physical recovery brought its own set of surprises. The process of my organs shifting back left me reeling in pain, a sensation compounded by my lack of awareness that this was normal. Every ache and pain fueled my anxiety, adding layers of fear to the already daunting task of keeping my newborn alive.

The realization hit me hard—I knew everything about pregnancy and birth but next to nothing about the reality of postpartum life and baby care. This gap in my knowledge made me feel incompetent, feeding into my anxiety and detracting from my mental wellbeing.

If there's anything my journey has taught me, it's the power of voice and shared experiences. No one should have to navigate postpartum life feeling isolated and uninformed. By pulling back the curtain on my own struggles, I hope to pave the way for more honest conversations. Let’s build that village, not just for the sake of our children, but for our own sake, too. Motherhood is not a solo journey—it's a shared narrative that we can write together, in all its messy, beautiful truth.

By fostering open dialogue and providing support, we're not just navigating the complexities of maternal mental health; we're redefining them.

Elle's Corner is born out of the need for this very village—a community where honesty isn't just welcomed, it's celebrated. Here, we strive to create a safe haven for mothers to share their stories, their fears, and their triumphs. It's a place where the veil of "perfect motherhood" is lifted, revealing the true, unedited journey of being a mom. By fostering open dialogue and providing support, we're not just navigating the complexities of maternal mental health; we're redefining them. In Elle's Corner, you'll find resources, empathy, and a sisterhood ready to walk with you every step of the way. We believe that by sharing our experiences, we can shed light on the shadows of postpartum life, making the path clearer and less daunting for those who follow. This corner of the internet is our village, built on the foundation of understanding, non-judgment, and collective wisdom. Together, we're stronger, braver, and never alone.